C. T. Suddeth

(my mother-in-law’s recollections from her childhood)

T-Rexes were so beautiful—green n’ yellow feathers—if you could get close to one and live to tell about it. Their bowling-ball-sized eyes could see forever. They were so noisy you could hear them coming for miles, but when they stood still, they could hear a pin drop. Luckily, their smell was so weak they couldn’t smell a teed-off skunk, but T-Rex reeked—they were too big to bathe in the creeks. Later, I will explain how to survive around T-Rexes.

[Editor’s note: someone spiked Mr. Suddeth’s coffee again]